Creativity every day

In my last post, I talked about procrastination and the difficulties of getting started. It’s been interesting to acknowledge how I’ve been putting off starting to create artwork about my circus childhood for a long time, but I have finally reached a stage when it seems to be ‘the right time’ to make this work. I’ve also had help in setting goals that support my creative work to find a way forward.

 

I began with a map on the wall, to prompt memories of the places that my family and I travelled to with the circus, and from this I began to write my stories down and to make some drawings. As the words tumbled out of me onto the page, I started to realise how intensely personal this subject matter is; even the smallest memories prompted big emotions at first, and I think this is a clue as to why I have been putting off the project for so long.

 

My writing developed from small anecdotes in my sketchbook, to writing in detail about my recollections on the computer, and I started to realise that I am writing a book, alongside creating visual artworks. These two creative pathways are working in parallel, but each is also feeding the other.

Gerry Cottle's Circus tent, Rebecca Farkas

When you have a lot of information that feeds into a project, the question is how to hone down lots of ideas into something manageable. My head and my sketchbook are full of a great many artworks I could make, but how do I decide what to do, or at least what to do first?

 

Recently, I’ve joined an online group run for artists by professional coach Ceri Hand, and I volunteered to be coached in one of the online sessions. This was a bit daunting, as it was in a group of people I didn’t know, and my previous experience is that coaching can put you in quite a vulnerable place. I needn’t have worried though, as it felt like a very supportive space and Ceri is excellent at asking the question that you most need to tackle! I sent her a summary of where I was at with my work and some images of my circus drawings beforehand, along with a couple of video snippets I had made.

 

During the session, Ceri helped me to set myself a goal, after discussing how having a deadline often helps me to progress (working on a self-driven project is more difficult, i.e. there's no set deadline to work towards). We established that I am trying to envision a finished piece of work too early in the process and it would be beneficial to spend more time exploring my subject, before I decide what form an artwork I make for exhibition might take. The goal she helped me set is to make as many drawings as I can for three months, and then look at all of the resulting drawings and see where it leads me.

 

This is an interesting challenge, as I find it quite difficult to set my own goals without the external pressure of a commission or upcoming show. Having this three-month drawing goal has freed me to stop worrying about what I am making, and just to enjoy being in the moment. There’s a lot less pressure to make a ‘finished’ drawing, as it doesn’t really matter if they ‘work’ or not because they are not necessarily going to be seen by other people. This, in turn, is allowing me to resist making a unified set of drawings in a particular format, and I have allowed myself to be led by the ideas in terms of the materials I am using. 

 

I have a pile of different sketchbooks on my drawing desk, with different sizes and different kinds of paper and I decide what I am going to draw, then choose the paper and drawing method that I think suits the subject best. I’ve used white paper, coloured paper and black paper so far. The black paper with drawings in white Conté pencil and pastel are interesting, as they produce a kind of ghost image that I find particularly relevant to a project about memories. I have so much wonderful reference material to work with, in terms of family photos and photos I find online of the circuses we were on. 

Tracey and Becca with Rani, Rebecca Farkas

 

I can’t always draw every day, but setting myself this challenge has certainly enabled me to increase the amount of work I am making. It’s not so important to do something ‘big’ on a Friday, which is my dedicated studio day. Now my mindset has changed, and I can do a quick drawing any time that I have half an hour spare or spend longer drawing, over several days. The drawing is aligning more with my writing practice, as I have found a rhythm with that by aiming to write 500 words a day. 

 

As ever, setting achievable goals and aiming to integrate creativity into every day has achieved more than waiting to make a larger piece of work in bigger chunks of time. My word-count is increasing every week, and I have a small but satisfying pile of drawings that is also getting larger by the week. I still don’t know exactly where this project is taking me, but I am enjoying the ride!